Sometimes there are no answers and there is no visible blinking beautiful light at the end of the tunnel–just tunnel.  Make apple crisp.  Even better, have somebody else make you apple crisp and serve it to you warm with a little heavy cream.  This is sugar at it’s best–HEALER.

Jonathan made me a mini with the four apples that we picked from our tree upstate.

Peel and core the apples. (For a maxi use 6 apples fresh from the farm as possible.  Try intimidating your grocer into getting the phone number of the guy with the apple farm.)  Toss with sugar to coat.  Heat up a heavy frying pan and add 2 tablespoons of butter.  When the butter starts to quiet down, add the apples.  No stirring.  Let them go until there is obvious caramelization happening around the edges of the apples.  Give them a flip and then let them go again so that they are beautifully and fully caramelized.  Remove from the pan right away.

In a bowl, rub together 1 stick of cold butter that has been cut into pieces, 1/2 cup of brown sugar, 1/2 cup of flour, and 1/2 cup cup of old fashioned rolled oats.  (not quick)

Put the apples in a baking pan and cover with the topping.  Set under the broiler, with the broiler at 400 degrees, until golden brown.

To prepare him for our visit, I told Ferdinand that his great grandma was dying.  He said, “has anyone asked her what she wants before she dies?”  I said, “you mean like does she want to go to Disneyland?”  He said, “Mom, at this point, she can’t go to Disneyland–I think all she’s gonna want is television, Cheetos and chocolate.”